Nothing to Lose: a generation for desperation

As I was walking around with my youth group, here are some of the sites and sounds (courtesy of TN): loads of vendors (Crowder, Kari Jobe, as well as others), Nothing to Lose gear, conversations about the "Secular world", and loads of bassy music. All of this brings so many memories back into my old youth days. Interesting perspective this weekend.

It's magic!

I love this time of year! It's usually like magic during the Thanksgiving/Christmas seasons. It is filled with times with friends and family. It truly is a blessing.

These seasons also bring about the magic. The childlike magic and excitement that comes every year. It is a time of reflection and joy of how God has blessed us over the year. Why can't we have that magic every day?

We can! Take time to remember the magic and share how God has blessed you with others. Seek ways to share how you have been blessed by God with other around you.

<3 JCD

It's all about You . . .

Today, I began thinking about was I doing enough. As I taught Sunday School this morning to the youth, I began to remember my calling. At the age of 14 or so, I knew that my calling was Missions. Little did I know that I would be sharing God to others through my job as an educator. As a young adult, I constantly grappled with this concept- Where is God going to send me, out of Rocky Mount, NC. Fast forward about 20 some years, and it finally clicked. It's not about Jessica conquering the masses out in some third world country or even somewhere away from home.

It's about doing God's Will right here in Rocky Mount. It's about loving people right where they are. It's about building relationships with friends and people you don't even know.

I encouraged my Sunday School class to reach out to someone this week, even someone that they may not like. Then, I watched this video here on Stephanie Brown's page.

I cannot wait to see what God has in store for me in the public school arena in the next few years. God has been preparing me for this mass group of students that I will one day be responsible for as an Administrator.

I will be finished with my add-on license in July. I hope that I will be able to get a job here in Nash County where the involvement in religion is at an extremely low percentage.

So really, it is all about Him . . .

What can you do to share the love of God with others this week and every week?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wgg2KYdMpqc&sns=em

So, lessons learned in the last few months ...

I really hate learning lessons, especially lessons that I should know already. I have spent the last few months trying to figure out why I am still single. *Disclaimer - I really have low self esteem.* I am a happening chick. I have a great personality, successful worker, nice house, great kid, and I am semi-cute.

It hit me today while watching one of those teeny-bopper movies. I cannot see what is in front of me. I do not truly love myself. I like myself on most days, but I am not satisfied with who I am right now, in my skin. Not that this will change with time, but I am going to work on loving me for awhile.

I really like my life and who I am. I don't think that will change. What can change is the way that I think about myself, and the way that I present myself.

I was waiting for something or someone, who clearly does not believe in the me I am currently. I now know that I want a person who will accept me for who I am. I am not going to change me too much.

It may not be the picture that I thought that I wanted, but I should give it a chance.

Just a walk in the park . . .

I have just been thinking lately about how my life is "just a walk in the park". I know that sounds strange coming from me, but it truly is. I have always felt that my life was not going in the right direction, or the direction that I thought that it should be going. I have realized that my life is exactly where it should be, and even a walk in the park. Let me try to explain . . .

You know how you plan things out in your mind as a young adult? Well, I did all of that, and strangely all of it has occured. It just occured in a different manner than I thought. I planned on getting married to my soul mate, having children, and having that fabulous job/ministry. I got all of that, but it did not occur the way that I thought. I got married to someone I thought I loved, but in actuality I loved who I thought the person was. I have a precious child that cannot be replaced. I would love more children, but that requires a new soul mate. I love my job, but it is not the direction that I believed that I was supposed to do.

Now, things are changing, yet again. Still looking for that new soul mate, although there is the dark horse that I cannot get out of my head. I would like more children, but I refuse to do all of that alone. A new scenario has popped up into the equation regarding that perfect job. I believe, wholeheartedly, that my life's work is to be a missionary. I get to do this everyday as a teacher, but now I have an opportunity to be a principal. Add to that, the exhaustion of everyday life as a singleton.

But really, my life is "just a walk in the park". I have food to eat, a place to live, a car, parents and a sibling that love me no matter what, and I have a beautiful child. As if that is not enough, I have a job, friends that support me, and I have a church family that I can count on when times get tough. To top it all off, I really do not lack for anything, other than material possessions, that are not important.

So, life is "just a walk in the park". You have to take a step back when you are feeling frustrated, confused, and overwhelmed. You may have to visit that graveyard to get yourself together, but you are just taking a break from the park scene to be the you that you are supposed to be.

Trouble in River City

"The idle brain is the devil's playground . . ." As I have come to find out today, there are a lot of things that tend to distract me. Television is a waste of time. I am not sleeping at night due to the fact that I am not in my structured environment. When my brain is not occupied, I tend to dwell on the realities of this world.

The realities are also a waste of time. I just need to be happy where I am. I need to occupy my time, and not constantly waste time dwelling and thinking.

I wish that I could convince my subconscious of this concept.

I See the Light

Clarity, clarity, clarity . . . I love it when clarity is revealed to you in just a moment of concidence (ahem, from God). Everything falls into place in time (God's time). God does have a sense of humor. He allows us realize what we want, when it is right according to His Will.

Read the lyrics to this lovely Disney song from the movie, "Tangled". It sums up my clarity that I am feeling today.

All those days watching in the windows
All those years outside looking in
All that time never even knowing
Just how blind I've been
Now I'm here blinking in the starlight
Now I'm here suddenly I see
Standing here it's all so clear
I'm where I'm meant to be

And at last I see the light
And it's like the fog has lifted
And at last I see the light
And it's like the sky is new
And it's warm and real and bright
And the world has somehow shifted
All at once everything looks different
Now that I see you

Eugene(Flynn)
All those days chasing down a daydream
All those years living in the blur
All that time never truly seeing
Things, the way they were
Now she's here shining in the starlight
Now she's here suddenly I know
If she's here it's crystal clear
I'm where I'm meant to go

Eugene(Flynn)and Repunzel
And at last I see the light
And it's like the fog has lifted
And at last I see the light
And it's like the sky is new
And it's warm and real and bright
And the world has somehow shifted
All at once everything looks different
Now that I see you

I hope that some clarity is revealed to you today! Take time to think, meditate, and re-evaluate.