Trading My Sorrows - Darrell Evans

"I am pressed, but not crushed, persecuted, not abandoned . . . I am blessed beyond the curse for His promise will endure, and His joy's going to be my strength . . . I'm trading my sorrows, I'm trading my shame, I'm laying them down for the joy of the Lord . . "

I had an epiphany today. I realized that I am not joyful, and the only person to blame is myself. I have been in a funk because I am tired of being alone. I keep being tempted to end this loneliness by jumping into a relationship that may or may not be a good thing. The truth is this uncertainty might be from God. Maybe God is trying to tell me to trust Him, give it all to Him, and then He will give me what I need in His time.

I have this timeline in my head. I love my one child that I have. I cannot imagine my life without her. I keep telling myself that I want more children. I truly believe that this more children bit is just to remind me that I want to get married again one day, and my clock is just ticking away. What if God has given me all of the children that I am meant to have? What if I am just so lonely, that my girl imagination is just running wild?

Here is the realization . . . I need to give all of these feelings of loneliness, more children, and sorrow to God. He is the only one that can meet all of these needs. If it is His will, then He will provide when He sees fit. If it is not His will, then I can rejoice through how He has blessed me.

Enjoy Darrell Evans' "Trading My Sorrows"

Love and Peace~ Jessie